Hey Guys! I would like to introduce you to Danielle from My Tiny Tribe Blog! She is my first guest blogger here on Little Forest Family and I am so excited!
Here is a little bit about her;
My names Danielle, I’m a mom of five plus one. I live in Tennessee. I enjoy crocheting and doing yoga. I love my essential oils and Jesus.
Anxiety in Motherhood
There are plenty of things to worry about in everyday life.
Health, work, friends, the economy…If you are a worrier by nature, it’s easy to find yourself in a state of heightened anxiety much of the time.
Add being a mother to the mix, and it’s hard not to fly right off of the anxiety handles.
I never really struggled much with anxiety in my life before I became a mom. However, since entering motherhood, I have discovered a whole new slew of topics that increase my anxiety and get my mind spinning.
It’s only by countering these motherhood anxiety triggers with truth that I am able to keep things in perspective and thrive in my journey as a mom.
Here are 3 thoughts that trigger my anxiety in motherhood.
1. Am I doing things right?
I have no idea what I’m doing! How do I know what decisions are right when other people do things differently and are so polarized about their way being the ‘right way.’ Co-sleeping or crib? Breast or bottle feeding? Wean after first birthday or continue longer? Cry it out or let baby wake up as many times as needed? Purees or baby-led weaning?
Nothing is right or wrong, but it sure feels like it.
People are so opinionated about the way they choose to do things and it often feels like they’re directly criticizing you if you do things differently. People ultimately want to feel validated and know they aren’t making the wrong choices, which is why their opinions can feel like blatant judgments.
2. Mom guilt.
Do I play with my kids enough? Do I read them enough books? Am I feeding them enough? Are they gaining enough weight? Am I handling their tantrums correctly?Am I setting them up for a lifetime of emotional or behavioral problems by how I am parenting them now? Am I a good enough mom for all five of my kids.
3. Comparison to others.
Other moms are better dressed, better rested, better homemakers and just plain better than me! Their kids are better dressed, have better rooms, better birthday parties and more fun than mine.They do exciting things with their days like take daily trips to Disneyland.Compared to that, I stink at motherhood!
3 corresponding truths about motherhood that combat these anxious thoughts..
1. When you think, “Am I doing things right?”, remember…
There is no single right way to do things.You get to decide what works best for you, your baby and your family. Try to focus on what those things are, and keep your eyes and ears turned inward.People have different opinions and will verbalize them loudly, often trying to validate their own choices and decisions.
2. When you experience mom guilt, remember…
You are enough.Mom guilt is the worst. And you are doing a great job. If you love your baby and you keep trying to do your best, you are doing things right.
3. When you compare yourself to others, remember…
Keep your eyes and ears turned inward.Focus where it matters, on your life and your family. This is especially true with social media and the internet.It’s been said many times, don’t compare your everyday life to someone else’s highlight reel. Social media NEVER tells the full story. There’s always more than meets the eye in the beautifully curated photos we see on social media.
Also, just because some moms love wearing high heels and lipstick doesn’t mean you need to feel bad about your yoga pants and flip flops. Are your kids fed, clothed, loved and happy? Then, you’re rocking this mom thing.
One of the biggest themes involved in combating anxiety in motherhood is to keep your eyes focused inward, on your own life.
We need to stop looking for validation outside of ourselves, our families and our homes. What other people choose to do in their parenting journey is ultimately their business. It does not dictate how good of a parent you are.